Unleash your Writer Abundance

Do you limit your ability to achieve because of money?

This isn’t a get-rich-quick scheme or anything of the sort, but an interesting fear artists and writers have when they get to a certain point in their careers.

I’ve seen the pictures floating around on my Facebook stream, my Plus feed, and my Twitter aggregator that states:

This isn't helping, thank you.

This isn’t helping, thank you.

I’m not sure if you’ve seen it before, but this actually makes me a little wary of the message being put forth by the artist.

Now, I’m not for giving everything away for free, nor am I about losing the ability to pay for common needs like bills, food, and a roof over your head, or anything else for that matter.

However, this picture sends out an unintended message that limits the ability for you to earn more money. Sounds crazy? Hear me out and maybe I might shine enough light on this to change your mind. Continue reading

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Slight writerly delay

Forgive my lack of updates today. I had something in the works, but someone decided they couldn’t stand the silence and needed to talk for hours on end.

It’s sort of like a shark, except drowning on the words instead of in water.

Ah well, look for an update tomorrow (hopefully), this time about limiting your abilities to earn money.

I’ll give you a hint:

i-dont-work-for-free2This is the wrong message to send.

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Confidence in Writing: Are You Doing it Right?

Is it impossible to have confidence? photo credit: h.koppdelaney via photopin cc

Is it impossible to have confidence?
photo credit: h.koppdelaney via photopin cc

Are you confident in your writing?

How many of you cringed as soon as you read that line?

If you’re like the majority of writers out there, you probably have a self-confidence issue when it comes to your writing. If you’re anything like me, it is so perplexing and (at times) suffocating that you almost feel like you are the lowliest liar that ever lied a lie. Your confidence is so low, and so shaken, you might as well be a drink served to a famous fictional spy.

What if I told you the reason why you have this confidence issue isn’t due to your abilities or your voice and style?

What if I told you, instead, it was how you view yourself and your writing as separate from everything else? Continue reading

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Refuse the Eternal Quest to be a Writer

photo credit: h.koppdelaney via photopin cc

photo credit: h.koppdelaney via photopin cc

Can you accept you are a writer?

Far too many people don’t accept themselves as a writer. I’ve seen some amazing work from some amazing individuals, and they’ll look me straight in the eye and tell me:

“Yeah, but I’m not really a writer.”

Where did this idea come from that writers aren’t really “writers” until they grab a brass ring or two?

Is it the devaluation of the value of words and writing in general? Is the word so cheap we can’t even see the worth of self-expression? Do we pin our hopes on the payment of dollars and cents versus the tangible ability to say what we mean with clarity and hope?

And then it hit me. We feel guilty. Continue reading

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Devaluing the Evil of Should in Writing

The Locks of Should

The Locks of “Should” that Bind You.
photo credit: Darwin Bell via photopin cc

Every “should” you hear tells you that you are a mistake.

No; not that you’ve made a mistake, but that you are a mistake.

Take a second and ask yourself how many times you’ve chided yourself for not doing something?

  •  I should get to writing that novel.
  •  I should be better at my wordocity.
  •  I should have more people viewing my blog
  •  I should feed the kids.

All right, except for the last one (really, go feed the kids. That’s not right!), you are undermining the most fragile thing a writer (or anyone else, really) has in their arsenal: Your confidence.

The Evil “Should”

When you think of those previous examples, what’s the thing you hear almost immediately afterward?

But.

I should be writing, but I am a worthless individual who can’t even finish a sentence.

It’s almost as dangerous as the “Yes, But” syndrome in the work life. You have the goal you want (to write more), and you just smashed it in the face, shanked it in the back, and then took its money when you finished the “but” part (basing your value on your output).

The word “should” often implies you are doing something wrong, that you are in error (or even worse, you ARE the error). Go over in your mind how you felt almost immediately after you used the word “should” in a sentence.

I’ll bet you felt pretty bad. So bad that you let the guilt and shame build up and actually keep you from writing anything at all.

So, why do we “should” our way to shame and guilt? Why can’t we be like others, as we “should” be able to do the same things other writers can do? Continue reading

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Your Peers Won’t Give You Validation (And Neither Should You)

photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc

photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc

None of your peers care about what you write.

As shocking as that line is, it is the truth. There are a few reasons, and I hope you share them with you here.

You see, as I trudged on with this “hobby” turned “let’s inflict more scars in my soul” called writing; I noticed something from a lot of the people involved with the industry.

They don’t actually care about what you write, they only care that you write it.

Now, it isn’t to say your writing is horrible and you should go hide under a rock (trust me, I’ve gotten that sort of feedback before), but it is saying that they aren’t going to validate your abilities by saying you are the next greatest (insert writer here). Continue reading

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Final Chapter: The Conclusion

photo credit: paul bica via photopin cc

photo credit: paul bica via photopin cc

So why did I write out this first half of my life story and share it all with you?

Was there more to it than met the eye? Was I looking for sympathy, explosions, hot chicks, and more drinks?

Actually, I did it because it gave me an opportunity to express who I am and what happened to me with a proper mindset and the ability to reach out to others who have been through what I’ve been through and made it to the other side.

You see, I am still wrestling with this thing called “writing,” and dealing with the definitions of what is and isn’t a “good writer.”

In the end, I have no drive to be a “successful writer,” as some of the other writers out there demand as a standard form and measure. I don’t have the drive to write countless books and be an authority in the realm of fiction, writing, and cheeseburgers.

I’ve lived a life, I figure I would share with people who were interested, and that’s what prompted this. If I do something in writing in the future, I am sure it will be in the same mindset as before: A method to express myself, to put out there into the world something that applies to my life, and to create a better understanding for you and I.

I also struggled with what this life was for. As you can tell from the twenty-three chapters, this life really wasn’t intended to be anything more than a “glitch” or an “error.” The cosmic quirk results of a man with woman problems and a lesbian with man problems overriding their programming to create me.

With these issues in tow, I often let myself believe I had no worth. I’ve often sulked into my little abyss to look at the dark heart of my muse and wonder why I am even here at this point.

However, I have heard this statement from other people who feel the same way. They might not have gone through the exact same things, but they feel the same way.

“I am worthless.”
“I am powerless.”
“I am an error.”
“I am a glitch.”
“No one / no thing loves me.”

I’ve spent the better part of two years to get over statements like this. I have spent more time consulting people regarding this feeling and doing my best to help them see the statement isn’t correct. Of course, the problem here is that I couldn’t apply the advice I gave to other people to myself.

It’s funny when you go through everything and believe your mind is the only thing that’s real, isn’t it?

Anyway, instead of plotting to sell off my life story at a buck ninety-nine and get a few looks here and there, I decided it was best to give it away for free.

Trust me, the writing gurus and masters are all angry at me for this. Screw ‘em!

I wrote it because it helped me remember some of the things I forgot. I wrote it because I wanted people to know more about me. I wrote it because I figured there are other people like me out there.

They are writers, artists, pure forms of expression out there wondering if they are alone in how they feel or what they went through.

And even though I can say they aren’t, it still doesn’t matter unless they read the story first. This is why it is here for you to read.

Whether or not it damns me for something in the future, so be it. I’ve had a few potential landlords comment on it and give me some strange moments because of a closet or the way a person walks through the grounds. While it is fantastic they took the time to read my story, it also means they didn’t quite get the overall theme and reason as to why I did it.

So, I’ll only ask for a few things from you at this point:

1. If you have read my tale up to the end, please share it with someone you believe might benefit from reading it. You never know who it might be, and the more you share, the easier it is to affect the people you love with positivity and kindness.

2. If you have any comments at all, please leave them below. I closed off comments for a reason, to funnel everything to this point so I can see what helped the most and what might have confused someone.

3. This is just one half of the story, but it isn’t everything. I haven’t touched on many of the other things in the second half of the story, nor did I tell some of the offshoots and weird stories from the first half. Should I write the second half, or should I post the strange offshoots for public consumption? That’s up to you and what you believe you’d like to read.

All in all, this was an eye opening experience that is just starting. I’d love to have you along for the ride. Please let me know what you think in the comments below and we’ll have a good dialogue (at least, I hope so)

Have a wonderful day and enjoy every moment!

- Matthew Eaton

photo credit: paul bica via photopin cc

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Chapter Twenty-Three: A Dream of Wolves

photo credit: Tambako the Jaguar via photopin cc

photo credit: Tambako the Jaguar via photopin cc

“Oh, listen to them The children of the night What sweet music they make” [From Bram Stoker's "Dracula" (1897)] May dreams be brought that I might reach… The gentle strains of midnight speech And frozen stars that gild the forest floor Through the swirling snow Volkh’s children come To run with me, to hunt as one To snatch the lambs of Christ From where they fall… “A Dream Of Wolves In The Snow” – Principle of Evil Made Flesh by Cradle of Filth, 1994 All good stories have the villain or antagonist face justice in some way, shape, or form, right? I wish I could tell you the villain of my story came face to face with a creator or belief and repented, truly repented, before going onto the great unknown, but the villain in my story is worthy of some sort of forgiveness. Now, hold on. Before you get on my stuff about, I should never forgive, and I chastised my aunt for doing the same thing which led to me being abused. You are right, but I offer this counter point: Do you want to be stuck in the past forever? Do you want to fear loving other people because one person hurt you? Do you want to become a recluse, waiting for salvation that won’t come because you never give it to yourself? Do you want to be stuck living that moment repeatedly until your last breath? If the answers to any of these are “no,” then you need to forgive the person who hurt you. You don’t have to accept their position, their methods, their ideals or anything else. You aren’t saying what they did was right, but you are letting go of the negative energy holding you back, keeping you from being who you because of your fear. However, I will come to this in the final chapter. For right now, let’s figure out what happened in the last moments of my villain’s life, shall we? Continue reading

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Chapter Twenty-Two: A Cold Stale Goodbye

photo credit: vanz via photopin cc

photo credit: vanz via photopin cc

I turn away but for a moment
And you have left me on my own
This feling grows like a seed inside me
It’s vines are strangling my insides
“A Cold Stale Goodbye” – The Stars Would Not Awake You by Tempestuous Fall, 2012

I have a track record with lesbians. Not a bad thing, and I never determined who should love whom based on a scripture or a belief. I was told multiple times I was encouraging people to their eternal doom in hell, but remember I was still an agitator and whatever I could do to make people unhappy, I would.

Again, the people in the story are still around and I’d rather not share how it happened or why it happened lest I reveal something I might pay for later.

I’ll sum it up like this.

• My stay at my friend’s place came to an end and I was asked to leave.
• I found another place and formed a bond based off of mutual annoyance more than mutual interest
• Lesbian dog.

The two lessons I learned here were as follows: Continue reading

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Chapter Twenty-One: The Stars

photo credit: nicora via photopin cc

photo credit: nicora via photopin cc

Dreams, moving away, flowing within me
Your face, once seemed so clear, now disappears
Your trace, formless in shape, shapeless in haze
Your name, I cannot say, I can’t remember your face…
“The Stars Would Not Awake You” – The Stars Would Not Awake You by Tempestuous Fall, 2012

Speaking of coffee and fellowship, let’s talk about the dirty rat hole that was Mr. Toot’s Coffeehouse.

No, it isn’t a dirty rat hole, nor is it that way now so don’t go by and tell these people how dirty it is. They are awesome people and it had a nice makeover.

However, back in the past, it was a dirty rat hole that kept us rats in line. It was where I met my next group of friends, the evil ones, and some of my lifelong friends on top of it…Well, at least it opened the door to getting lifelong friends.

Really, it was about the fucked up stuff that happened, the things so unbelievable that you’d never accept they happened except I had witnesses and they’d back me up.

What were some of the things? Well, I don’t want to go into too much detail since these people are still around and ready to dole out some justice if I ever mentioned them by name, but I can give you the one line synopsis of each event. Sit down and have a drink, you’ll need it. Continue reading

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